Ted Rising for Heisman

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University of Kansas quarterback Ted Rising is a man who makes the bigger men around him look like littler men.

For the past two seasons he has absolutely dominated the Big XII, easily leading it in passing yards, rushing homedowns, field goals, and three pointers.  His generosity on the field is unmatched, and he has led his teammates to many conference records.  His top two receivers, Kerry Meier and Dezmon Briscoe, rank 2nd and 3rd in all-time Big XII receptions.  They trail only the 1st place holder, Ted Rising.

His generosity on the field doesn’t stop at his teammates.  In 2007, despite beating him in every single category, Ted Rising willingly gave the Heisman Trophy to University of Florida quarterback Tim Tebow.  A year later, he again gave away the Heisman, sending it to Oklahoma quarterback Sam Bradford.  Ted Rising was sure to step out of the spotlight both times, and would take measures to make the award winners’ deservingness look authentic.  There were many games where Ted Rising would edit live game film while simultaneously playing the quarterback position in order to make his own performance look poorer.

Ted Rising is more than just a passer, though.  He is widely known for being extremely elusive in the backfield and it is rumored that he can only be caught when he wants to be.  Evidence supports this theory, as the only person who ever sacked Ted Rising was himself.

There is no mistaking that he is of Heisman caliber, especially since he’s won it twice already.  But this year, something must change. It is our professional opinion that he should be selfless and keep the award.  Ted Rising is the paragon of what an athlete should be.  When he steps foot onto the field, he plays not for the name on the back of his jersey, but for the name on the front of it!   He gives so much to the University of Kansas each time he dons that crimson and blue jersey with the number five cleanly stitched onto the back.  It is time for us, as the classiest fans in the Big XII, who would never tear down three goal posts in one season, to repay him.

The next time you are watching the Kansas Jayhawks play, whether it is in person or on a television set, and you see Ted Rising score a homedown from center ice, be sure to let him know of your appreciation.  Bellow his name at the top of your lungs in a bestial roar.

“TED RISING!!!”

Only then will he finally realize that he needs to let himself be known as a three-time Heisman Trophy winner.

Ted Rising for Heisman.

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  • The first, hopefully only, non-review to grace theXsection!

  • Will Snider

    amen! haha